Lots to Say

I have lots to say, but so little time to say it...

Cool things that are happening..
I am working.. making art, helping people make art. This makes me happy. I have several beginners this session. They remind me of me when I started, and ground me-keeping me off my pedestal by remembering we all have to start somewhere. It is refreshing and frustrating at the same time. I have some GREAT helpers in the studio who just put the icing on the cake for me. They make my job seem easy when they are there and hard when they are not.
I got to spend some time with the GRANDONE this past weekend. He is amazing and wonderful and kissable, huggable and loveable. My daughter is an amazing MOM!
I went kayaking on Monday.. one of my top 10 trips I would say. The water was peaceful, there were only a few motorboats.. I felt I almost had the lake to myself. I did some paddling in which I totally "zenned" out and felt timeless, weightless and free. 6 hours alone paddling, gives one lots of time to think. I think about my worries, my successes and where do I go from here. I feel that the past several months has been peeling me back to who I really am, although I don't know if I will ever be sure, I am feeling more and more comfortable with myself and my thoughts.

I should have a computer very soon!!! My friend D. is buying it, and letting me make payments!! I will be glad to have my own, and to be able to write and assemble my work/photos/lessons into one cohesive unit again. I also promise always to back up everthing so I don't loose it ALL again. I feel I am having a do-over, and maybe I needed that. I will try to coincide my finishing cleaning out my office with the arrival of the computer, that way I can have a VERY FRESH and clean start.

I need to make more money!! (Don't we all!) I am tired of living on the edge.(aren't we all?)..
I am still concerned with the fact that I make "things". "Things" that people don't necessarily NEED. I believe we are going into a time of "less is more" and that concerns me being that I am in the business of making "more". I like to make things for people to use and to enjoy. I LIKE drinking out of handmade coffee cups and eating out of handmade bowls. What I LOVE though is making "things" that have meaning. I want to portray an emotion, experience or feeling in my work. It is hard to do. Sometimes what I want to say and what the viewer sees are very different. ---now how do I reconcile this with my need for more income. I want to make things that are not NEEDED. I want to make things that give people pause and make them think.
How do I do that and make money to live on too? Do I sacrifice and loose what I have materially so I can do it? Or do I give up that notion until the economy is better?
My mom said to me, "The number one thing to you is to make pots.." almost like it was a revelation to her. I know this! I know it so well.. I feel like I am always torn between pots and income. How do I make this work? Funny thing is, someone else, who I just met said something very similar to me. If this is so obvious to everyone how come I am so torn over it? How come you stereotypically have to be poor to make art?

Well.. the money maker is calling, gotta go to work... maybe some art will come today.

LOVE, LOVE, LOVE,
Jada